Sunday blues - How to deal with your inner SELF

boring sunday blues depression quarantine covid-19

„Life would be so wonderful

if we only knew, what to do with it.


- Greta Garbo -



We all know this feeling: the weather outside is grey, it rains at best and you sit at home and just don't know what to do with yourself. We have so many possibilities, but we are not really convinced and we do not know where to start. Above all, we feel lazy and unmotivated. But this phenomenon doesn't only refer to the classic Sundays. Especially in times when we are sitting at home more often, be it holidays, illness, unemployment or the 2020 quarantine due to the coronavirus. All these demand a lot from our inner self, which we seem to deal with far too seldom.






Keeping yourself busy or being kept busy


At this point you should first of all clarify why on days, when you have nothing to do, you feel crushed and lazy rather than active and motivated. But now you have all the possibilities and can play every card from your deck. But this is not enough. There is not too little motivation. But why?


As described in the book Ikigai, there is a very simple reason for this. From Monday to Friday we have a strict plan. We usually get up at fixed times, go to work, then to the gym or a class, go shopping, then home where we cook, help the children with their homework and then fall into bed tired at the end of the day. On Saturday we usually do all the errands that we didn't do during the week. And then there is Sunday, when most shops are closed and you suddenly don't know what to do with yourself. You surely noticed something?


It's because you are kept busy. You have to go to work or school or somewhere. That means that others or society make a plan for you. You just have to follow it! It doesn't come by choice, or at least not by free choice. When the daily routine is over and you get to the point where you have to spend time with yourself, some people have a problem.


Because now you have to care about what to do with yourself. Suddenly our time is our responsibility. However, this is not due to an incapacity, but simply because of habits. You are used to being rushed through everyday life and running from appointment to appointment. The time that you have for yourself or the time that you can plan for yourself is much less in everyone's life. We are now responsible for filling this free time ourselves. But how do we spend it best?  Fill your time with your purpose of life!


Always ask yourself: Am I being kept busy or am I keeping myself busy?






Purpose of life


The purpose of life. A huge topic. It always sounds so epic and utopian to achieve. But the goal of life can change constantly. It doesn't always have to be the one big treasure at the end of the rainbow. Of course this happens and big goals are wonderful, but smaller goals are just equally supportive for the mind.


Examples could be:

  • Spending time with friends/family
  • Working out
  • Learn something new
  • Travel
  • A particular hobby


These rough examples may well be the current goal in a person's life. If you take great pleasure in cooking and inviting your friends and relatives, then this can be your goal without having to have a guilty conscience. It is just a matter of thinking about it. And there we come again to the inner self.



What is the inner self?


An interesting question, which has been answered differently by philosophers, esoterics, scientists and religions. But roughly speaking:



The inner self is shaped by your upbringing, your fears, experiences and the social expectations to which you submit. A lot is expected of you. Especially parents expect you to study this or to marry him/her etc. Society in general has fixed expectations of how you should behave or what is appropriate and political correct. From all these demands and expectations your self is formed. 



But actually you can decide what is important for you and how you want to behave. People tend to forget, that you can influence it.


What does all this have to do with the Sunday Blues?, you might ask yourself. Well, it's that you need/want to keep yourself busy. Many avoid it and have problems being alone with themselves. Thereby you have to ask yourself exactly these questions:




What do I really want in my life? 




What do I really want at this moment?




Do you want to spend time with your family because you want to or because you feel obligated? Do you go jogging because it gives you a wonderful body feeling or because you are afraid of being called lazy? You can decide for yourself! Always!


Afterwards read the article I wrote about the purpose of life. It may give you further inspiration. It is linked at the end of the article.


So, maybe you still don't know what you really want to do? If you honestly ask yourself the above questions, then you should be able to get pretty close to an answer. You can just do what you always wanted to do and simply postponed doing, because you said: "you don't have time for it". Why don't you just start? Here are a few suggestions to help you get over your Sunday blues mood.






3 suggestions for the enrichment of your self



1. Spend time with friends/family


Of course you don't have to be told to spend time with your friends, children or partner. You probably do that at your own convenience. But especially on days when you don't know what to do with yourself, it would be a nice thing to spend time with your loved ones because you really want to.


As an example: Take Valentine's Day. This is a day that has arisen from consumption, when society and the expectations of others force you to spend time with your partner. I repeat, there is nothing wrong with it. But you just do it because it is mandatory on this very day. This brings up the question: Do you ever make such an effort on other "non-valentine" days, because you really want to? You know what I'm trying to say. 


Act of your own free will and look forward to finally spending time with people you like. Plan a trip, a picnic or anything else with your friends. Build the latest Lego Star Wars Stardestroyer together with your kids or have a romantic day with your partner. Do something that you want to do and that will give you and others a lot of joy and pleasure.


Plan ahead so you can look forward to finally having the time off to experience these things!





 2. Learn something new:


When learning, one always quickly thinks of a boring book and lecture notes. No, it could be anything. Learn something new every time you don't know what to do on your days off. Haven't you always wanted to learn Italian, Karate, an instrument, Asian cooking or juggling? There are endless possibilities. And here we come again to the point where you can ignore your inner self. Because it might suggest to you that this or that is stupid or silly, too difficult or too demanding.


Let go of this thinking and do what you want to do with all your heart. If you don't do it now, then when? Later!, I hear many say. When does this "later" come? Is it coming at all? And what if it doesn't? You really don't have endless time. The clock runs out for all of us one day. This is not pessimism, but rather an encouragement to enjoy life to the fullest. 


If you have ever read or seen something that has sparked a kind of euphoria in you, then go after it. Now is the perfect opportunity. You really don't have to go all the way. Do it while it's good for you and you're having fun. If after three visits you realize that you don't like the Squirrel-Club anymore, then so be it. So find out where the next Hula Hoop workshop is in your area. Learn climbing, Japanese or tailoring. It's not about getting another hobby. It's about doing what you've always wanted to do and putting a smile on your face. No matter what others think.





3. Just relax


What would be so bad about just relaxing? Netflix & Chill, so to speak. Not necessarily related to sex, but actually chilling. You are allowed to fully enjoy the luxury of not having to do anything. Especially if you have a strict program during the week, you suddenly sit there and find it very unsatisfying to just do nothing. 


But especially then, you have to tell yourself: It's OKAY to just relax and do nothing!


Do only what suits you. For cleaning, washing clothes etc. you still have time the next day. Don't get me wrong, because I'm not a fan of postponing things, but especially on Sundays, I just like to do nothing.  With NOTHING I mean things like: Watching movies, a comfortable and long walk, spending relaxed time with friends/family or eating something delicious.


You are not a machine and even God had to rest on the 7th day. So tell yourself: It's perfectly OK to rest. It takes away the stress you feel when you become inactive. Take a bath or massage, listen to your favorite music or read an inspiring book, play Playstation or watch a movie. It's YOUR time, so enjoy it and forget that it's a waste of time. It's only a waste when you do it out of frustration and leave out all the other more important things for a long period.








It's time for you. And you can decide for yourself. Leave society and the expectations of others out of it and ask yourself what you really want to do. If it wouldn't matter what others think, what would you do, what would excite you, what would you enjoy? See this free time as an opportunity to finally do the things you always wanted to do, even if only for a few times.


If you still have trouble pulling yourself together, plan ahead. Even from home, you can now communicate and meet your friends online via Skype, Discord, Whatsapp and so on. Shop in advance for the things you want to cook on Sunday. Get your favorite recipe from your grandmother and recook it. Involve your family and enjoy this time. Make sure you don't stress yourself, because then the free time becomes a burden.






I hope the article was helpful for you. If so, why don't you share it so that others can benefit from it, too? I wish YOU the best.







Relevant articles that might interest you:



memento mori
purpose of life
Just do it

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